Comedy In Cosmos Fan Gifts

"I'm sexually attracted to space."

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

Non-Drip ?

It is said there is a black hole in the middle of the galaxy. But heaven knows what it looks like!

"I must have pressed the wrong button."

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

'What's PPI and how did you get this number?'

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

'They're out there, they swallow your stuff, and who're you gonna call?'

"Actually, they all look alike to me."

'Can you believe it? - This hayseed doesn't even know which GALAXY we're in!'

"It is called A Night to Remember. It portrays a ritual mating dance from the early 21st-century."

"What's so galling is that you don't even realize how Earthist you are."

Angels Playing Frisbee with a Halo.

"Two things are infinite: The universe and human stupididy' and I'm not sure about the universe." Albert Einstein. Our colleague and I were going to debate, with me arguing the universe is finite and he's arguing that it's infinite. But he pulled out saying the debate organizers are biased against his position. He didn't believe they were simply advising folks to arrive early when they said "space is limited."

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

"Hey, universe! I'm significant and I'm in charge!"

Man Reading story 'U.F.O. Sighted' with alien peeking over his shoulder.

'I've had a toothache for the last million light years, take me to your dentist.'

'Well yes, they sent me into space: But to be perfectly honest, I had no idea as to what was going on...'

'They come down here to smoke.'

A workman ponders a bolt on a track

'The trouble started when the world put together a large group of synchronized banks.'

Spaceman serving shrimp.

Search for Extraterrestrial Life. Ernie is working on a theory that alien life forms avoid the Milky Way galaxy because they're lactose intolerant.

First space criminal investigation

"The Lord has heard your prayers and has sent me to say unto you, shut up about it already."

"Astronomers say I don't have a 'dark' side. Tell that to my therapist."

"I think we walked into the wrong bar."

'Ooh, look! A shooting star. Make a wish.'

Bad luck.

"Poop. I forgot my coffee mug was on the roof of the saucer."

'This won't hurt a bit...'

"Captain...I'm detecting Hemorrhoids off our starboard bow."