Comedy Concertgoer T-Shirts

How to deliver a baby grand.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

Italica

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

"The last time I heard a beat like this I was at a Grateful Dead concert."

Johannes Sebastian Bach

'I've got two tickets to Handel's Messiah -- What time do you get off work?'

"Free Bird!"

'It states in his will that if he becomes brain dead he wants to go unplugged.'

Six jazz instruments.

"This next song is just a song. Try not to read anything into it."

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

"Oh, yes - BEAUTIFUL singer he was - but could he snap his fingers. . ?"

Young boy thinks he's spotted an old rocker.

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

Songbird.

Fuzz - Max has the taste of success.

Amy Winehouse, up in Rock N' Roll heaven.