Comedic Web Surfer T-Shirts

'I told you not to look up your ailments on the internet' - computer screen reads 'You have 3 days to live',

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

Pushy Dog

Visual Gag: An about to be married Bride using a real train as a wedding gown train

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

'We've been lucky - sometimes you can be out here the whole day and fail to see a single boat!'

Jumble Sale

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

"You heading south again this summer?"

'It wasn't the strength of your argument. It was your breath.'

Jeff makes some nice jugs.

As the years passed, Grandpa became more absent minded...

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

Vestibular Nerve: What it takes for a Vestibular System to wear paisleys with with pin stripes.

"Any other educational qualifications besides Trump university?"

Rollercoaster police chase.

For a few dollars more, we can get a suite. Spaghetti Westin.

Finally. A home exercise system that really is a clothes rack!

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

Student to teacher: 'If my paper is late it's because I'm waiting for the most current event.'

'It's been so long since he's been on dry land.'

"Why aren't you wearing any pants?"

'If they let me take you home for christmas, I'll be able to unwrap you with the presents...'

"It's your husband from beyond. He says stop trying to 'Google' him."

'Whatever you do, don't push: 'control', 'alt;, 'anvil'.'

'So, what have we learnt here? We do not have knife fights on the bouncy castle!'

'Oh... I was supposed to swallow the pill?!'

"When you said you were getting a pet to help you through the lockdown, I thought you meant a cat."

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

Computer clown.

'You didn't train for this marathon, did you?'

Eskimo in Igloo