Comedic Spirit Prints

'Your fly snapped off three hours ago, young man, but you were casting so beautifully I didn't want to disturb you.'

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

'Well, given that you have three broken ribs, laughing is bound to be painful...'

'Nice this kite sailboat. But how do you actually land it?'

A 'fruitcake disposal' receptacle is set out during Christmas time . . .

"Say: 'Alien Abduction'."

He's working his way up to lions!

'Alice, the blonde, speaking.'

'You're too old for Valentine, Tito!'

"I too prefer these dress optional dos."

I'm getting old, I spotted a couple of brown hairs among the punk.

Get crazy once in a while

"Ted's flamboyantly straight."

'Look at the bright side of it!'

Mr Briggs's sPleasures of Fishing - No. I

"And what say you, Dermatitis?"

"Me? I thougt they were your anniversary surprise!"

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

X-RAY

Washing Machine Torture

'Do you mean I leave a lot to be desired bad, or a lot to be desired good?'

'I warned her that too much dieting could be a danger to her health!'

'I hope we don't start getting competition from redundant bankers homes.'

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

'The bartender referred me to a shoe shine boy, and the shoe shine boy referred me to you.'

'I want a refund! It refuses to go into my son's room!!'

"My mating dances were unsuccessful, so I tried reciting poetry: didn't work either..."

"I'm $37,000 in debt for my theatre degree. I may be acting, but my tears are real."

Birds in a birdhouse watching TV.

"Hey, baby - that doesn't mean you!"

"Do I look like the sort who knows anything about lawns?"

Bob's Marriage Advice: 'Let me give you some advice on marriage, Joe. . . try to think of me as the pope. . .'

". . . ashes to ashes, dust to dust, a handful of ground coriander, the zest of a lemon. . ."

"Your uniform has arrived for working for the royal male."