Comedic Pet Antics Gifts

Although Bowser did seem to understand the concept of being house-trained.....

"It get it – you're hungry."

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

Armed dogs wait for hot dog vendor.

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

'If you must know, yes, I do sometimes fake purring.'

"Teach me not to care."

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

'No need to shout.'

Man wearing a dog cone

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

"You're God-knows-where all day long, then at night you pounce on my head... this is not a relationship."

"He's a rescue, and before that he was in Vaudeville."

101 uses of a dead cat: rollerskates

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

"Want to see me make him beg, roll over and shake?"

RING! RING! RING!: 'Not the cell phone AGAIN!'

"These days, I don't eat homework. I just install ransomware."

"It's OK! Stop splashing!"

'This is the last time I take the dog out for a walk!'

'Why do they refuse to drink water out of a bowl that's been left out for two hours, but go gaga over toilet water?'

Hang Time Fido

101 uses of a dead cat: bagpipe

'Can't read this one either. Think anyone would mind if I just rolled around in them?'

'Play dead.'

Tinder for dogs