Comedic Healthcare Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

"I yelled 'shazam' and there was lightning and a big explosion. They say I was unconcious for two hours."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"So, let's catch a wellness wave!"

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

Caution. Slippery when wet.

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

'You're either getting smaller or they're giving you bigger pillows.'

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

"You heading south again this summer?"

'He's lookin' at me!'

Jeff was watching his weight.

'Well, at least we were able to remove that pesky hangnail. So, you have to be pretty stoked about that."

Vestibular Nerve: What it takes for a Vestibular System to wear paisleys with with pin stripes.

'Hi Honey! I wanted to thank you for taking the baby to day care this morning!'

Flying Ear Specialist

"Any other educational qualifications besides Trump university?"

I told you to take the stairs instead of elevators. Taking escalators isn't meeting me halfway.

"It's a simple stress test - I do your blood work, send it to the lab, and never get back to you with the results."

Student to teacher: 'If my paper is late it's because I'm waiting for the most current event.'

"It's your husband from beyond. He says stop trying to 'Google' him."

'If they let me take you home for christmas, I'll be able to unwrap you with the presents...'

'I got the idea from a veterinarian friend of mine.'

"When you said you were getting a pet to help you through the lockdown, I thought you meant a cat."

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

'So, what have we learnt here? We do not have knife fights on the bouncy castle!'

'Oh... I was supposed to swallow the pill?!'

No, thank you, I brought my own bag.

"It's heartbreaking. He blew out his arm training for the season's big modern art exhibit, and he hasn't been able to get anything in the strike zone since then!"

Eskimo in Igloo