Comedic Collectivist Pillows

Wedding Day Itinerary.

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

Surf Casting

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Trumpeter swan meets trombone swan.

Zoo: No Hunting.

"My computer just texted me."

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

'I'm sorry Martha, but I've fallen in love with a light bulb.'

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

'Look at that! Our first big snowfall, Timmy!'

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

"Don't think of it as hell. . . just think of it as a normally recurring seasonal weather pattern."

"Tia Carmen, I think I'm growing up. I ate five slices of cold pizza at 3 in the morning...and I woke up with a stomachache."

"Don't think of it as forgetting stuff. Think of it as freeing up brain space."

'Well, you heard wrong -- Zen Buddhism doesn't have a Missouri Synod.'

"Hey! This is news."

Glimpses One Dollar

'We've minimized your tax liability by losing a lot of your principle.'

'Listen son-if God had wanted us to fly he would have given us air tickets.'

"If atheism is a religion, why hasn't it broken up into splinter groups who murder each other?"

"Young lady! You aren't going anywhere dressed like that!"

'I'm knitting you sweater... do you want it too big or too small?'

"You heading south again this summer?"