Color Dilemma Expert Gifts

"C'mon, Lady! We've run out of earth tones!!"

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

Trash-talkin' artists

"Unfortunately, what we thought to be the black box turned out to be the navy blue box"

F&E Designs. My reversible jacket didn't turn out very well.

"He wasn't quite dark enough to name 'midnight' so I named him ten o'clock."

'I think it's called RED!'

'She leaves before I finish her portrait.'

This stuff fixes things at home, why not here?

Paint-By-Letters.

'I think your doctor gave you the wrong note, Sir. We don't have any bread and milk.'

"He was gold prospecting, but since he dropped his phone in the water, he's now phone prospecting."

'The text for this course is available at the college bookstore and on iTunes in a choice of designer colors...avocado, sienna, peach, indigo, Mediterranean, and sunburst.'

"Too much beige."

No decision is a great choice sometimes.

A Salesperson's Dilemma

'Want to know how to deal with problem students? Have them sit in front of a computer that's turned off.'

Neil liked to co-ordinate his outfits with his soft furnishings.

Blues consultant.

I keep telling Van Gogh his colors are off, but he only hears half of what I say.

'Banks' man pulling petals out of a flower marked 'Sell out' 'Don't sell out'.

"I'll bet an exciting shade of beige would really make these walls pop."

I'm giving you a parking ticket!

Books. I want to get my husband one of those coloring books for adults. He tends to see things in black and white.

Artist: '...then after my blue period there's this half hearted attempt from my thoroughly fed-up patch.'

"'Anguish,' 'Parasite,' 'Malaise.' Let's move Mr. Kafka out of the paint color naming department."

Colours associated with different political movements in a box of artist's paints. The artist is holding a tube of 'Gaddafi Green'.

I could do THAT Art

"Eenie,meeni,minie,mo..."

"Should I buy larger exercise clothes? Or just start exercising?"

I'm not colour-blind!

"You'd be a lot more successful if you didn't wear black trousers with brown shoes."

I lost my wallet here. Could you check lost and found? Sure. What's it look like? Oh, it's leathery, canvas, nylon-ish … blue-black gray-purpley-greenish … it has a Visa-Mastercard-Amex-Discoverish cards and one-ten-fivey dollars in it. I keep an I.D. of a dear friend in it for sentimental reasons. Get out.