Color Collector T-Shirts

At my house I can only use green.

"The poka dot and tiger stripe ribbon raises awareness that we're running out of ribbon colors."

Henri Matisse

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

A new you. 'First, you've got to stop lying about you age.' It didn't start off well.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

Woman applying makeup

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"More concealer?"

17th Century Anonymous Dutch Paintings Museum: Formerly 'Rembrandt Museum'.

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

'Don't know much about art but I know what I like.'

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

Doric, Ionic, Corinthian, and Broken Pillars.

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

These colour charts are ridiculous... coal' black, 'midnight' black, 'licquorice black'.' - 'There's too much choice! All I want is plain old boring bl-' - 'Ooooooh... 'panther' black.' -

'Anyone else would be satisfied with one coat, but not you!'

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

'How old is this vase?'

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.