College Transition Gifts

'Look on the bright side, we haven't lost a son, we've gained a parking place!'

Continuing education.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

"One year closer to college!"

How come rich kids do so well on SAT tests? Their parents give them books, fancy trips, lessons and

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

"Someday, Sweetheart, you’ll look back on this day and think to yourself, ‘Covid ruined my college experience.’"

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

Finally I understand why it's called 'Higher Education!'

"Never mind rehearsing for your first year at Uni. Get up now!"

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

Fishbowl rebellion.

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

Trust

'You have failed on all counts...'

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

' I said, you WIN, I'll pay your dorm rent!!!'

Student - Haven't emailed in 2 days.

'I'm trying to get my competence and my confidence in the same place.'

"If we learned anything in law school, we learned that you can never have enough wiggle room."

'I wanted to ask you about life-experience credit.'

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

State U. He procrastinated and is now trying to do all the work for his middle English literature class in a couple of days. "Canterburied," is he?!

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."