Collector Of Monarchies Pillows

King writing 'Reigned all day' in diary as it rains outside.

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"You're on a what?!"

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'It's in my belly-button if you must know!'

'He followed me home, Dad -- can I oppress him?'

"Want to find out if you're also king of the swamp?"

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

'Can you spare a minute, madam - I'm doing a king of all I survey.'

News of the Day - Savings Bank.

Queen.

"She leaked WHAT to the press?"

'I think that's always how it's been!'

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

The Loneliness of Power

Your doctor's prescription is ready, Mr. Hargrove. I have too ask. King size or regular?

Not that one. It's got the chips in it.

Lost and found - 'Can you desribe it?' (Queen being asked having lost her crown).

Queen Anne

'Let's face it, we've been getting desperate for new titles.'

'Camilla, I don't mind you writing your own vows but you can't start 'Now Diana is dead...''

'Your Majesty, the Pretender to the Throne is here.'

'You can't cancel a summit meeting because of a bad haircut!'

Queen Elizabeth overtakes Victoria as longest reigning monarch on September 9th, 2015

'This next song is for my ex-wife, because she owns it and collects all the royalties.'

"That is your will, Your Highness, and this is the will of the people."

'Strange as it may seem, you have the common cold.'

The King Of L.A.

Fish king swimming around his bowl!

"It's from Attila the Hun - It says, 'this is your last notice...'"

"It's okay, dear - I'm fighting for PEACE!"

'Look at that spread. Some fish have it so good.'

'Flat Earth Society' with a globe-shaped drinks cabinet.

Man Drowns in Globe