Collector Of Funny Comics T-Shirts

'He says you demolished his front door when you delivered the paper this morning.'

"I'm away one night and you're shaking up with teh foreman packer!"

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

The Fourth Little Pig

'Goodness, no Doctor, my husband is not calling you any insulting names. He's a duck and that's the only word he knows.'

"It's not the persistent lack of sunlight or freezing temperatures that bother me - it's the crowds I can't stand."

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

A large leaf falling on a dog

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

Welcome Spring.

Bears catching fish

'Super Dog'

"Trust me kiddo, even donkey's years fly by way too fast..."

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

'What clan do you belong to?'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"I don't know what else we can do. He won't look up from the screen!"

"You're worried about salmonella? We're vultures for cripes sake!"

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"