Collecting Tv Shows Gifts

Customer to TV repair man - "Thank god you got here. I was beginning to wander around."

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

Thinks he's too cool for school.

"The following film has been formatted to fir the screen of the newer and more expensive television set."

Vegetarian Birds

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Turkish Democracy

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

You don't need to believe EVERYTHING you are told.

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

"Nixon was the same way when he first got here."

Okay, start shouting them in for their annual bonuses.

"Can you come back next week? He's napping."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

'Let's see. One dozen red wigglers, two dozen nightcrawlers,three dozen crickets. Want flies with that?'

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

"Says, property of the I.R.S."

Scientists continue their research on the Hippocampus.

Cat and owner sticking out tongues at each other.

Automatic Congressman

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

'Oh dear. My son's an evolutionary throw forward.'

Car Breast-Feeding

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"Are you sure it's okay for cardinals to live at a Protestant church?"

'I hope this DVD has some worthwhile in-front-of-the-scenes content.'