Collecting Regal Items Pillows

'Go on then.....Rule!'

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

Posh Easter Egg

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

"Instead of wishes, I got you a gift card."

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."

On the scale of 1-10, do you like it?

Pianist.

The Mortons: It's all about our money.

Duchess

"Darn paparazzi."

'Camilla, I don't mind you writing your own vows but you can't start 'Now Diana is dead...''

And when you give up using this to exercise, with the option keyboard it easily converts into a harpsichord!

"Stop pestering me. Dating you is the last thing I'd do."

Baron Frankenstein on Christmas morning.

"That is your will, Your Highness, and this is the will of the people."

King

'Okay dear, it's your turn to go stand in the front yard.'

Common Dodo!

Vladimir Putin offers Uncle Sam a bauble with Donald Trump's head on it.

'Eric, who gave me a handmade bookmark for Christmas, gets a 62 percent on the midterm. Ann gave me a mug. She gets a 71. Gina gave me a weekend for two in Vienna. She scored a 98!'

Mistletoe and Mistlefoot

Yuletide

"It's from Attila the Hun - It says, 'this is your last notice...'"

"It's okay, dear - I'm fighting for PEACE!"

'Greetings 2000' Santa passing out gasmasks as presents to children

"Mainly we supply material for nuclear reactors, electronics and costume jewelry."

"Hold yer fire! It's just a t-shirt cannon!"

"When you said you were rich, I never dreamed you were this rich!"

Elf Tortures Santa.

'Princess Cinderella, the servants want you to stop constantly criticising their cleaning standards...'

'Buy old masters, they hold their value better than old mistresses.'

"I got you a gift."