Collecting Novel Items Gifts

101 uses of a dead cat: disguise.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

Fly Football

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

Clown on bike.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

hard-boiled egg...

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Woman blowing dust off book 'Desert Romance'

Rare Books

Characters jumping out of a book.

Great British Eccentrics.

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

Do it yourself books.

Sock Puppet in Literature

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

The Shrinking Dollar.

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.