Collecting Motorcycles Gifts

Surgeon requests patient's motorbike if operation is unsucessful.

'A bike this nice, I didn't think you'd mind me bathing it in your bathtub. Do you have an extra blanket, it'll be sleeping in our room.'

Printing and Engraving. I want my motorcycle company letterhead to include an image of our product. A stationery bike!

"My only suggestion is we freeze it and hope a future generation can repair it."

Drool Marks

Man on motorbike with side kennel.

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

"Do you buy cars here?"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

'A 50's vintage automobile...a billiards room. YOu, my firend, have got it all.'

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

'God's speed.'

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

Dairy Devil

'Look at those arms! I was born to ride a Harley Davidson!'

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

Biker Lawn Mower

"You bought a 1964 Chevy ragtop Impala?!"

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

'And I say he makes us look bad when he rides around listening to those books.'

"I'm turning into my mother, and it's awesome!"

Biker At Museum

"A classic lowrider bike usually is built on a late 1960's Schwinn 20-inch frame."

'How about a nice saloon?'

'Will the surgery leave a scar?'

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

"Lately, I've thinking about getting a motorcycle ... "

"...and it comes with sat-nav, which as you can see the previous owner used all the time."

'I can't come out to play, I have to help my owner work on his bike. Sometimes it sucks being a smart breed.'

James May