Collecting Breakables Pillows

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

'I got tired of wet feet all the time.'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

'Me, I'm home-schooled: Getting to and from school was taking too much of my time...'

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."

A Fork-lift.

Pianist.

Rubber Ring

'Someday I hope he grows up into a sports bottle...just like his father.'

"Pick me! No me! Me! Pick me! Pick ME!"

'You're SURE that you've played water polo before?'

Stan's OK Deliveries

And when you give up using this to exercise, with the option keyboard it easily converts into a harpsichord!

The Spoonish Inquisition

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

There's a fork in the road.

'Greetings 2000' Santa passing out gasmasks as presents to children

"Hold yer fire! It's just a t-shirt cannon!"

"Hey, look on the bright side, at least we're not wine coolers."

"At last - the lair of the Bigfoot!!"

Water/Still water/Not water any more.

Lager Drinker.

"The Usual But With Some Added Creepyness"

'You guys mind if I bet rare stamps? I'm all out of money.'

101 uses of a dead cat: pipe tamper.