Cold And Flu Warrior Gifts

"It's typical cold/flu medicine, but the extra strength advertising made me buy it."

The Cougher

'It's the only known prevention for swine flu...Big bad wolf serum...'

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

Flu vaccine.

Vaccine

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

Trawling for Fish.

"I can't have anything that's a food."

Flu Vaccine.

"This feels so familiar."

Pick one: ounce of prevention or pound of cure.

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

Doctor's house visit "What's made him worse since I phoned Doctor was worrying about the cost of a house call"

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

Man looking at his shower-bath on a cold morning

Trick or Treatment.

"Yes, I know darling, getting a sore throat is bad: it really hurts to swallow..."

Protecting Nature

"I kid you not, he shot that duck right over the middle of the lake and said 'fetch'! Do you have any idea how cold that water is?!"

How to save on your heating bill...

"It's almost flu season! Stay indoors! Touch no one!"

'Quick, shut the door! The flu!'

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"

"That's the main problem with your rear wheel drive model!"

Ice Sculpting Class.

Air catarrh.

"Each time someone enters this house, they'll be doused in antibacterial soap. It's just during the flu season."

"It's nine degrees, but with the wind chill it feels like minus two hundred seventeen."

'You don't want to eat me. I have Bird Flu.'