Coffee Taster Gifts

'O.K. Everyone...Tea break!'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Bad for you but to die for

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

"I'm getting red fruits, earth tones, and oak. Amen."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"Don't take the ones with teeth marks. They've got hard centres ."

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Complementary Beverages

Wine taster with mineral water

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

My comfort zone

"I'm getting a lot of burnt notes."

This coffee can keep you up

'The bouquet is reminiscent of rubber nose - but then, it always is...'

'I've found taking a sip of another table's wine is an effective conversation starter.'

'The statue of David? I thought you said Mogen David.'

'Frank, it's water.'

"You can tatse the slopes, er I mean hops in this."

"Honestly, it's not what you think. Mostly it's just a seemingly never-ending series of pointless tasks - but at the end of it you get to sit down in front of a TV with a beer."

'In order to be the king's permanent wine taster, you only have to be able to do 3 things: drink, swallow...and live.'

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

IRS, 'Yes, but in order to deduct it, you have to be a LICENSED wine-taster.'