Coffee Morning Reader Gifts

"The more I read about these cats the less I care for them."

Non-Power Breakfast

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

"I'm enhancing my appreciation for the knowledge gathered by humankind."

"I didn't want this book to end, so I stopped reading it midway."

'I'm looking for people who find me intimidating.'

"So have you been watching Bridgerton?"

"A barista should always follow his instincts."

"Could you repeat all that, I lost you at 'good morning.'"

Join me in a cup of tea!

"This coffee seems a little staler every morning, Edwina!"

'...and then the coffee morning led to an afternoon beer festival, followed by a cheese and wine tasting evening.'

Voting on their Seats

'I've given up on looking for the bluebird of happiness. . . I'd settle for the chicken of contentment!'

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

Teachers Lounge. That's funny -- I was sure the "No Child Left Behind" act would cover field trips.

"Some days I wake up grumpy. Other days, I let him sleep."

"Looks like Amazon is going to start delivering babies."

"Remind me what I was talking about—I wasn't listening."

"Flavor? It's 'let me drink my first cup before I stab you in the eyes' flavor."

"Grrr."

'Realism first thing in the morning might kill him, Mirror Ralph. I'd better stand in.'

'I hate to take a problem to bed with me, but my husband refuses to sleep alone.'

I went to the book store, drank coffee, listened to some guitar player, talked to a friend, and forgot to buy my book!

Literary Lunch

'I'm not concerned that coffee might keep me awake all night. I have credit problems that do that for me.'

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

'So then I thought... why not buy big magnets?'

'I've decided to try that new 'camel's milk'... One hump or two?'

"They're shifting the responsibility to the people with identifiable skills."

'I thought it was a coffee morning.'

"Was there any game in any sport last night which we can discuss?"

'I don't dare ask my students to answer questions - they keep expecting prizes like on Oprah.'