Coffee Chuggers Pillows

"Stu's not a morning person."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Man's best friends."

Working Late

"Motivational seminars are too expensive. Just buy stronger coffee."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

"Does it count it after an 80 hour week he's here in body but his mind is off in La La land?"

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

Non-Jet Lag.

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

"Rough day; I have a staff meeting at nine, presentation at ten, big conference call at noon and then at three I'm getting fired and escorted out of the building by security."

Try Our New Slam Dunk Coffee and Donut Special.

"I'm a stay-at-work dad."

Working from Home: In/Still In

"What's the big deal? We pull all-nighters all the time."

"I need this! A laptop with a cup holder!"

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

I think it must have been one hierarchical pyramid reduction strategy too many!...

Why The Ball Is Jumping Out

'Test results are back. Coffee, donuts, sleep deprivation. Doc, you've got to start taking better care of yourself.'

"The 'Ex' huh?"

Also I don't like coffee, so I'll be working through my coffee breaks.

The morning show for people who HATE mornings

Getting things done.

"Man! I just had to pull another all-dayer."

"You're being audited. Are you nervous?"

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

'I don't think there actually is a right side of the bed for you to wake up on, Dear!'

"Tuesday mornings don't get enough respect. They should be hated just as much as Monday mornings."

Triple espresso. Forget it, Uncle Mort. Your doctors said no caffeine. I am not your Uncle Mort, I am someone else altogether. Oh yeah? Who are you? I am … Drinkum … Coffeeman … Worthington-Smythe … of the Florida Coffeeman-Worthington-Smythes. You may have heard of us ... we're a family of um ... Troubadours. I, myself, wrote several ballads for the likes of Sinatra, Pat Boone, and Jimi Hendrix. So if I were to Google that right now, Google would confirm that? Google is an abomination!!! One ge