Coastal Trips Pillows

'We were just passing so....'

Local Knowledge

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

Holiday time.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

Shellfie

'the selling of seashells by the seashore was sluggish.'

Where cartoon characters go on holiday...

Energy saving mode

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

"Here's to East, West, South and Bridgehampton, and all the little Hamptons in between."

Sale on Bathing Suits, One Size Fits None.

"I'm heading north but these days it just seems easier to walk."

'Actually, most brides would find being stranded on a deserted beach very romantic...'

Segregated Beach

S.P.F. 1,000

'Beach snowman.'

'No, you can't have a stick of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerrychwrudobwllanstisiliogogogoch rock. I'll get you on in Rhyl.'

Sandy Floss

"My feet are cold."

"Better lose the hat people are staring."

"I visited the beach on Google Earth. Next time I'll wear sunscreen."

"Going to the beach with kids Sand in eyes, food, crevices Chasing after them with sun cream Frantically checking they haven't been kidnapped or swept out to sea Enjoying it"

"I keep telling him there's a big difference between swimming and floating."

Beachy Hair

"You've got a bit of thong caught between your front teeth."

'Just how long have you been a mountain guide?'

Men see an old lady in a round hat from the back and think she is a pretty young lady.

Lighthouse switch

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

'All right, guys, I got it, you forgot about me… didn't you?'

'Muriel had a traumatic experience at a topless beach -- she was sunbathing, and a toddler attacked her.'