Coaching Enthusiast Gifts

'As an exercise I placed eleven dustbins on the pitch and made the team dribble around them...The bins won 5-0.'

What else is there to wish for?

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

Cristiano Ronaldo

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

"Remember double negatives are a complete no-no."

'I give the same advice to all new teachers. Pretend you know what you are doing.'

"...and how do you feel about being labelled the new Great British hope?"

'Our coach telecommutes.'

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"Holly and Michael were growing envious of their son's imaginary friend… Rickey and me are going to the Knicks game with Bruce Springsteen!"

"Blood sweat and tears. I think it's supposed to make us feel guilty."

'That time of year, eh Ben, don't know whether to go hunting or fishing?'

"He gave me an 'F' on my resume."

"Sit!"

"You say your biggest faults are working too hard and blind loyalty to your employer. What do you take me for… An idiot?"

"If you wish to see your artwork displayed, don't forget your bio."

What football coaches and players can learn from a loss

"There's something missing on your resume'..."

Great coachees recognise great coaches.

"It's not a riot, Dear. It's a football game."

'The entire team is lethargic. Tell the athletic trainer to whip up a cure.'

'You can argue until you're blue in the face, Todd. But you rolled your eyes, and Adolescent Ref is not going to change his mind!'

'George,you're spending too much time bass fishing,it's starting to show on you.'

"I was named Prisoner of the Year for ten years running."

'I think I just got a hit.'

Spring Training