Clutter Warrior Pillows

Shopping for an exercise bike

"The rest of the cubicle owners asked me to tell you to clean up your cubicle. You're bringing down the value of the other cubicles in the office."

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

Rage.

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

"I didn't spark joy."

Politicians' basements (as seen on TV)

"It has come to my attention that some work-from-home employees aren't maintaining company standards."

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

Fact: The average person spends 4.3 hours per week looking for things that are misplaced, misfiled or mislabeled.

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"Would it kill you to compost?"

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

The household cavalry

'I've misplaced everything.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

The day Bob finally understood radiation of species.

'Filthy Earthlings got here before us!'

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

The Ladies of Kew encouraged everybody to recycle.

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

"Please don't interrupt Mommy when she's in her gym slash office slash living room slash cafeteria."

The Move.

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'What's the difference? It was a man-made lake in the first place.'

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

'Sir, I've got a computer to avoid a giant mess but unfortunately I can't find the computer in this giant mess!'

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

"We need a better piling system."

Recycle or ruin the planet?