Club Soda Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Hilda, what gets wine out again, is it club soda?'

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

I could have danced all night!

Party Animals.

'No ice.'

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

Join me in a Martini?

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

"Death Star? Is that in the Valley?"

The Alpha Seltzer

"I love this time of day."

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

A man is in an office, behind him is a glass box containing a glass and a bottle, there is a sign saying 'in case of emergency'

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Superheroes Having a Drink

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

'Fried chickens.'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"This looks like a job for 'Margarita Man!'"

Sparks Fly When The Little Gray Suit Meets The Little Black Dress

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

Cell Bar & Grill. Happy Hour All Day. The new owner is an endorphin.

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)