Cloud Snacker T-Shirts

Eating in Heaven.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Honest Vending

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

"Billy, we don't need to feed that vacuum robot."

Student Food Pyramid

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

In prehistoric times, there were hunters, gatherers and guys who never had change.

Breakfast surreal.

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

"It's a map to the vending machines."

"You complete me."

Romulus and Remus and the Vending Machine

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

Gym. Whatever weight I manage to lose here I always seem to find on my way home. Donuts.

"Stuffing your face while watching TV does cause obesity."

'Because it's there!'

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!

Oysters in June - delicious!