Closet Cleaner Gifts

No offense, but I'm eternally grateful to know that you stand no chance of ever passing on your genes. That's where you're wrong. I pass on my jeans at least once a year. What do you think Craigslist was invented for? Craigslist? Yeah. Whenever I get bored, I go on there and pass on my jeans. Sometimes I don't even charge anything. Tell me you're not saying what I think you're saying. I'm saying that site is full of people who'd like to get into my pants.

Shoe addict.

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

Hat Boxes, in the Closet

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"I'm sick and tired of black."

'My power ties are demanding more closet space.'

A woman and her home simultaneously achieve 'casual'.

"How many capsule wardrobes is this again?"

"Have you seen the walk-in broom closet?"

Carrots on sticks wardrobe.

'This closet needs digitized.'

Closet.

It's too hard to clean my closet. Take out everything. Throw them into "keep", "donate" or "toss" boxes. Ok. Done!

Time to put away your presents. I don't have room. You said you "needed" a new jacket. I do! My old one's too small. Donate it. I would. But I can't get it out of my closet.

"That's it! You've watched TV out here long enough! We need to spend more family time together! I'm putting this thing in the closet!"

'And this is the walk-in clos..' - 'We'll take it!!'

"What is it about an unfavorable soccer outcome that makes me want to wreak immediate havoc in the streets?"

"May I tidy up the infield?"

"That? - oh my husband - a closet bricklayer."

We're all litigation crazy. Last week I had to sue my wife for joint custody of the closet.

'Three words, Corporal: 'Advanced military technology',,, Relax,'

'I guess you'd call it a queer request. He wants his ashes put in a fruit jar and hidden in the closet.'

"Oh, I love this! The huge walk-in closet comes with it's own master bedroom!"

For Sale. And, of course, there's a roomy walk-in closet.

'Does it have plenty of closet space? My husband sulks a lot.'

His and Hers Wardrobe.

'Now, are you looking for a closet or something under a bed?'

Is clutter necessary?

'Maybe you could get dressed faster if you lost that speed bump around your waist.'

"...yes I just popped in to feed your cat and do a spot of vacuuming!"

"Oh, Harold! This is too nice!"

"You've probably already guessed, ...I'm the bluebird of sloppiness."