Clogged Up Crusader T-Shirts

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

Ironing day.

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

'I blame the nothing for something culture.'

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

"Global warming, income inequalities, protests and COVID-19. Get up and do something! Help out already, now!!!"

Two Players both holding the same cue.

Fumes from furniture

"It would kill him to run a vacuum?"

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

An anglerfish lights up rubbish at the bottom of the ocean

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

"It's a survival instinct...they know there's an underwater pipe pumping out untreated effluent somewhere around here."

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

"Let me know when the floor is clean enough for me to put my feet on it again."

'Mom, I cleaned my room like you told me.'

An incident from the Eglinton Tournament, scene 2.

'Oh no, green waxy build up.'

Cleaner

"You'll have to clean your room by yourself. Your plea for disaster aid has been turned down by the President."

"I'm afraid it's a bad case of libel!"

'I didn't write the report. I printed it directly from the Internet, but I did all of the stapling and collating myself.'

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

"Not again!"

'I'm afarid your son has all the classic elements of geekism,minus the technical expertise.'

'We can't get enough of these makeover shows.'

'He's been driven mad by reading about all these huge litigation cases...'