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'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

Punctuation Police

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A Copy Editor and His Dog

Someone who knows apostrophes

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

Second lifeReal life.

Thesaurus Company

"Drop everything, Dominic. I need you to proof this for blasphemy."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

'Could you be more specific than you feel zucky?'

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

Editor.

"This is gibberish, Nigel, but most persuasive gibberish."

THE REPORT: Some of this is brilliant, but that can be fixed.

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

'If I've learned anything, it's believe half of what's in the newspapers, and even less of what's in your e-mail.'

'Stroke! Stroke! Stroke!'

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

'You'll be broadening up your horizons in a cubicle.'

His last words were, "Stop correcting my grammar!" Here Lays Fred P. Smink.

Internet Cafe.

Copywriter's blank paper compared to the gridded screen of a content provider.

"I know R&D feels that the product warrants at least two 'really'."