Clingy Child Champion Pillows

'Try cutting down on his cling peaches.'

'The child is very illogical'

A Tit for Tat.

Fitness Programme for babies

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"Having nannies really changes you."

'Honey, what's wrong?! Why are you crying?'

"Instead of taking a bath couldn't I just run through a carwash?"

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

Mother racing to work for a company with day care and a health club.

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

'Is that why our games of hide and seek are over so quickly?'

Muy mum rocks.

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

Using the skill of pottery to make athletics trophy.

'I haven't been campaigning for a creche all these years for nothing - you're going!'

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

Skateboard Olympics.

"Being a mum is a full-time job."

"Where would young families be without grandparents as unpaid childminders?"

'When the bough broke, did the daycare center's insurance rates go up?'

Mind them while I go shopping and I'll give you 50 bucks extra!

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Ed."

'Did Dr. Spock ever write anything about how to handle PARENTS?'

"Today we practiced counting to five, and the teacher practiced counting to ten."

"I'm not surprised that lady's so fat. . . The baby's been blowing her up for hours."

'You like that? Okay, ONE MORE TIME! The wheels on the bus go round and round!...'

Boy skating on lake, classmates giving scores.

"She seems nice. A little clingy... but nice."

"Before we begin the hymn of thanksgiving, I'd like each of you mothers to take a moment to count her little blessings."

Little schoolboy enjoys picking his nose.

"Brad? This is your congressman. Get Mommy on the phone, please."

'I'll see the ones with the clean underwear first.'