Kindergarten Champion Pillows

"Today we practiced counting to five, and the teacher practiced counting to ten."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'The child is very illogical'

Children's education

A Tit for Tat.

Fitness Programme for babies

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"Having nannies really changes you."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

Not much money, glory, or praise

'Too much for the school run?'

'Honey, what's wrong?! Why are you crying?'

Mother racing to work for a company with day care and a health club.

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

'Is that why our games of hide and seek are over so quickly?'

Lessons.

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

"Thanks for your report on flamingos Johnny."

'I don't have to go to school. My mom teachers me.'

Mind them while I go shopping and I'll give you 50 bucks extra!

'If you don't do your homework, you'll be a child left behind.'

"Where would young families be without grandparents as unpaid childminders?"

'When the bough broke, did the daycare center's insurance rates go up?'

"Being a mum is a full-time job."

'I haven't been campaigning for a creche all these years for nothing - you're going!'

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

Parents teacher conference.

'Come out of that cupboard. If you can't stand up to the class bully, who will? After all, you are the Headmaster...?'

"Tammy first, then Charles."

"Who gives you homework?"

'Did Dr. Spock ever write anything about how to handle PARENTS?'

"Before we begin the hymn of thanksgiving, I'd like each of you mothers to take a moment to count her little blessings."

"I'm not surprised that lady's so fat. . . The baby's been blowing her up for hours."