Cliche Connoisseur Gifts

I think I prefer the desert island cliche."

Rare Exceptions: The Straw that became a massage therapist dedicated to treating chronic back pain in camels...

'Doc, sometimes I feel that my life is turning into some sort of boring cartoon cliche...'

"I wrote my essay specifically so that Hollywood could easily make a blockbuster out of it!"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"Call security, Miss Rightman. I have an overwhelming urge to throw good money after bad"

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

Snowyphus

'If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Totalitarian Humour

The Devil's in the detail!

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

The Forever Stamp

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

'Here's the good news. 'Happy camper' and 'are we having fun yet' have been added to the official list of banned cliches.'

Crazy old clown cat lady.

Man frozen in portrait pose.

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

Clown's In and Out Trays.

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

"Hello darling, what do you do for a living?"

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

Moliere

Clown Watercooler

'This doesn't work as a heart-felt plea for world peace, but with some astute editing, it might be great on a greeting card.'

'Lookout, here comes another boatload of cartoonists.'