Clean Kitchen Dreamer Gifts

You missed a spot!

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

"I thought the cake came out awfully dense."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

'Ever thought of having the place re-carpeted?'

"I'm unable to process this image."

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

Boy baking a cake.

'Do we have any empty calories in this house!!'

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

"How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?"

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"Honey, look-those are the tiles I was thinking about for the kitchen."

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."

UFO = Unidentified frying object.

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

Instead of a cap and gown Mike got a hairnet and spatula.

Bakery. The smell of freshly baked bread is the only truly perfect man-made thing on earth.

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

House for sale, appliances included (in the yard).

'The two things you cook best are meatloaf and apple pie!... Which one is this?'

'Of course, the self-cleaning models tend to cost a little more.'

'One good thing about this place is that I can honestly say I own everything as far as the eye can see.'

Come to think of it...I could do with a showcase kitchen as it goes...

Summer holiday activities the whole family will love.

"Ok, who just gave my cooking a 1-star review on Yelp?"

'Whoa! When did we get that big Tupperware bowl?'

Scientist with model of a house in a test tube.

'Nothing yet - that multi-storey is putting people off.'

'Do you mind if my son watches you cook? I'm trying to bring him up to be a vegetarian.'

'There! Now all we gotta decide is what we're gonna make!'

A Victorian lion chair is given a tail.