Clean Beauty Advocate T-Shirts

"There's a sale on at the Body Shop...!"

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

Have you got your make up on yet?

'Cleanliness is next to 'clean room' in the dictionary. Look it up.'

Queen Kong

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

"...when you're through in there, my kids room could use a demonstration too."

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

"Tempting, but I'm on a plastic cleanse this week."

In the art gallery

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

The return of Miss Subways

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

'I'm just draining the reservoir.'

The Messy Sink

Animal cosmetic testing

'Single-use' - Word of the year 2018

'My mom invented baths!'

'Only peanut butter and jelly fingers, Sir.'

Medieval Torture

Organically Grown Athlete - Guaranteed free of chemicals.

"The cost of a haircut? It depends on what's in your underpants."

'Why's that girl got weird brown hair?'

"I want a natural birth, no make-up, no lip gloss, no..."

'No wrinkles or botox for me: I naturally change my skin every so often...'

School janitor empties numbers out of math room waste basket.

"I asked at reception for the person who runs the school... and they sent me to you!"

'Wash balls here.'

"You can tell he's not a stray. He picks up after himself."

'Don't mind my husband, he just wants to be 65!'

Irregular Fruits and Veggies: "It's our inner beauty that counts..."

Ham Sanitizer

"Ok, ok, I'll use a bloody coaster!"