Classroom Whisperer Pillows

'I know I can train them to be thoughtful productive citizens if I can ever get past sit.'

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

"It's hard to control the ones that are used to free-range parenting."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

'I'm sorry son, parents don't like the 11 plus...'

Compression

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"Where are redactions when you need them?"

Computer help.

"Guess what. School is presented without commercial interruption."

"Love your feng shui!"

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

"I'm really great thanks. The boss loves my ideas, he says I'm ahead of my time!" "Hi John, how are you? Good meeting?"

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

"On Monday, they will introduce a new office layout and you'll be near Judy, who isn't good at sharing her charger. . ."

"Tell the employees that from now I want them to do as I say, not as I do."

'That's o.k., Dugan - 'why do I even bother?' was a rhetorical question.'

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

"This isn't bad. Ten per cent all A's."

'I understand yours is a highly coveted position in this company.'

'To maximize student achievement, the Feng Shui consultant advises one student per classroom.'

"May I have your attention please???" "NO!!!"

'I find the best way to stop students from always talking to each other in class, is to keep asking questions. Then they have nothing to say.'

'I think our filing system is a little too obvious.'

"For gosh sakes, Mike! Will you please quit interrupting me while I eavesdrop on Mary's gossipy remarks to Bill during Jean's important presentation?"

'You always go that extra mile, don't you Molly.'

"Has it occurred to you that you occasionally feign a lack of understanding?" "What the hell does that mean?"

'Please stand by. You have temporarily lost your picture. Broadcasting will resume when you have finished your homework.'

Tough germ.

'I've started an Employee Recognition Program. I know who you are.'

'Don't worry, the first thirty years of teaching are the hardest.'