Classroom Contrarian Gifts

"There's also a link to my manifesto in the notes section—www.freewilioz.org, articles four and five, respectively."

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

Computer Class.

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

'The fourth quarter was no walk in the park. Especially for those who count on us to walk in the park.'

'Harrison, going against your better judgement has made us a lot of money...'

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

'I'm having a hard time balancing homework and family time.'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

"It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full if you have a case."

Burning the Other

“Honestly class, where are your minds?!”

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

"I just completely disagree with what you just said about America lacking focus."

'He's always looking for an argument!'

"What if my bliss happens to be suing people?"

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

"Don't you shush us, mister! We're famous consultants!"

Guru Shifted Thinking

Whipping Cream

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

'We're looking for new, original thinkers...people who can think 'outside the box'...'

'If everyone's thinking outside the box a man who thinks inside the box is bound to have the advantage.'

The Devil screeming hate speech through a megaphone called "tolerance" at a person holding up a sign that says "free speech"

"O.K., here I am in the fourth grade, but is that really what I want to be doing with my life?"

"But playing computer games help my. . . uh. . . dexterity, so I can do my school work better!"

"That's my survival kit. It has a meditation tape, aspirin and rose-coloured glasses."

"Isn't it great? I found little 'Classroom Mode' switches behind their ears."

"I'm Billy's mother, and this is his attorney!"

"People...do you FINALLY understand the concept of 'Visual Narrative?'"

'I used to be a 'nut', but since I made millions in the market, I'm a 'contrarian'.'