Classroom Chaos Controller Gifts

"Fear not, Miss Hathaway. Just go home and listen to a cd of howling wolves or screeching monkeys and by Monday you'll be ready for your 3rd grade class."

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'I sense we might be having a problem with our appointment scheduling.'

'Caw blimey!'

Hair Traffic control.

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

'I guess what happens in Kindergarten, doesn't stay in Kindergarten.'

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

Family Home.

Nanny with children on leash

Metropolitan Prize Puzzles.

"I work out of my house filled with kids and pets. My hobby is trying to keep sane."

"For the love of God Billy, you've got to stop putting things up your nose!"

'This isn't a good time. I'm in trouble with the Dean for using my cell phone in class. I'll call you back.'

'Normally I'd be strongly opposed to a womanh your age electing a permanent birth control option...but in your case-'

'He has a learning disorder.'

"Don't be fooled. Chaos reigns."

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"That was bound to happen. Well, don't just stand there. Tell them you'll call back after you finish brushing your teeth."

Why children, apples and honey should not be left unsupervised.

"Alice, please! You're a practice teacher! At some point I have to leave you alone with them!"

'Did I throw which spitball?'

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

'Why? The year just started! She's not in any trouble. . . Ok. . . yet.'

"When they say to use protection... this is what you're protecting against."

Speeding pram with mum hanging on.

Volcano Danger: 'We are shutting down your Wright Brothers exhibit until Andy's volcano is dormant again.'

NASA Mission Control Room & Out of Control Room

Announcement over school PA: 'We're going to begin this week with an all-school search for Mr. Ridley - last Friday's substitute teacher.'

'I did have an eventful day at school, but nothing, in my opinion, to write home about.'

Stadium usher of the month.

Mother telling off quarreling children

'Yes, I have your letter on my desk in front of me.'