Classics Professor Gifts

Just be cool... just be cool...

Tragic Physiognomies - Heracles: 'Guess if you can, and choose if you dare!'

I love Classics.

Sisyphus pushes giant hamster wheel up a hill.

Augustus. Claudius. Aurelius. Tinitus.

"You're early."

"Doric Ionic Ozempic"

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

'Veni, vidi, vici vino.'

Old ladies trying to remove fig leaf from statue.

'You like my fancy dress? - I'm not wearing fancy dress.'

Vulcan

'Hmph. College kids.'

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

Archimedes helps Sisyphus

'Et tu Yakamoto?'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

Subatomic particles

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

The Giamatti era

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

What Does God Know?

Smart Bomb.

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

Obama punishing Assad

"I can't believe I'm paying $5,000 a month for you to stream Intro to Psychology when I get all of TV for $15.99."

'New career low - gave out a page of Ulysses to my freshmen and they thought it was a wordsearch.'

Theodore Roosevelt

Laboratory: Protons /Electrons/Morons

True Debate Fun

History Department: 'I used to be a revisionist myself, you know!'