Classical Charm T-Shirts

Girl Band, "I wish you'd tell your mum we don't need her in the group!"

Happy Valentine's Day.

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

Colonial Larrysburg.

"Call Harris back from retirement and ask him how we did things around here before computers."

Jack in the Box

It was owned by a little old lady who could make a decision faster than you.

Person Reading For Pleasure

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

'I will now play a selection of digital audio files I downloaded today.'

Women rush to man with 'I heart emotions' t-shirt.

A rake jumps from a window onto a horse

"Warm and rich, fresh and bright, with depth and intensity. Not the wine, you."

"My mating dances were unsuccessful, so I tried reciting poetry: didn't work either..."

"Son, you're old enough now to whittle your own condom."

Let me stand behind that one and you take my picture.

Lockdown had left Nigel desperate for a haircut.

"Hey, I don't see Harry Truman's name on the ballot!"

"It takes years before some people are comfortable enough to say hello."

"Take this, Luke. They say it's impossible to get a decent baguette west of the Pecos."

Bending beneath the weight of his burden, he lay it upon the moss (Atala).

'Do you have anything that smells like wedding bells?'

Adult filmstrips

'Sure been busy! Good thing it's the slow time of year!'

General Store Modernises

Spring Cleaning

An Irishman unfamiliar with how a telephone works

"Carmen, how are you today? Wait! Don't tell me! You're as wonderful and as beautiful and charming as ever!"

Chimney Sweep

"With a name like Barney Stone, I do real well with the ladies on Valentine's day."

"So close to the house! And with a half moon! Living the dream!"

"It's not outdated - it's retro."

Sex and the Old City

'I see more of those compacts every day.'

'Suddenly, Ken regretted eating the ploughman's lunch.'