Classic Communication Lover Gifts

Bell invents the telephone.

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"Before texting we had to write letters by hand, and before emojis we honestly just bottled up our emotions."

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

"My Gmail account is full. I can't get any more email." "So?" "I'll miss email. It was so old-timey. You could write hundreds or even thousands of words, with actual paragraphs." "People didn't see any little animations to show them you were typing. They had to actually wonder if you were going to reply." "And the spam was fun. You never got to hear from Nigerian princes while you're checking your texts." "Just delete stuff." "If you delete a few gigs of old emails, you'll be able to get n

"I don't mind getting email from you, Stevens. But don't ever send me another smiley-face emoji."

Bar Therapy

After talking one stranger to death, Velma starts in on the next.

Bird Messaging

"Ignore it. Telemarketer."

'Mind you, this isn't a secret I'd tell just everybody.'

Next Year's Postal Service Marketing Campaign.

'Yes, I laugh at most things, but it doesn't mean I can't have a serious conversation...'

"Instead of careful interpretation of the prose, maybe try pronouncing even the most basic words like an insane person?"

Ok, I'm back. Sorry about the screaming.

And what kind of banter do you want with that? I got light, witty, or wry. Breakfast.

'Let's go some place where we can walk.'

'Sorry, guys. I can't go out. I'm grounded.'

20 years as Stamp Club Chaorman and they send my retirement card by E-MAIL.

"If I had my life to live over again, I'd unlearn macrame."

Lance, do you realize that the only thing we have in common is our relationship? Not true, Gloria

"It's for you."

Lady praises date for being a good conversationalist.

"I notice the Apaches are using a new font."

'I'll get my people to talk to your people, and we can go off and have a picnic.'

"Nice talking to you."

'How come no one ever sends me a fax?'

"Ping me when you're done, yeah?"

Taxi Debates

"Hi. My name is Jonathan, and I'll be your analyst today."

Along with technology came the ascension of curmudgeon man: 'Well, back in my day, we'd just walk over and talk to each other!'

'He prefers old-style communications - Yelling at you.'

"E...I...E...I...O."

The Original Drone