Classic Comedy Enthusiast Pillows

Mr. Pickwick in the pound

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Marx Brothers.

'Who's Charlie Chaplin?'

'I'm not too happy about this new identity you lot have given me!'

'I'm so happy I could help you with your allergy to snakes, Miss Medusa!'

Primitive magician

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

Biliard Enthusiast

'You must have misunderstood, dear -- I'm sure they don't sell old generals at government auctions!'

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

Moon Line UP

Dante Alighieri

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

'We've been picking up your radio broadcasts- You must be Fibber McGee and Molly'

'We'll return to the evening news right after this message from the Three Stooges....'

"My great-uncle Lupe owned a barber shop! He made a lot of money!"

"Miss, you said that a single rabbit could reproduce a hundred times a year? What about a married rabbit?"

"No Eric, you're NOT funny haha. . . you're funny peculiar. . !"

"Is it wrong to be evasive and not answer questions?"

"Caw blimey Missus"-"He's a Carry-On Crow"

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

"I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Jackie Gleason's Old Desk: Trays read: InOutPow, right in the kisser.

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

"Knock! Knock! Who's there? What, seriously? You mean you haven't installed personal security cameras?"

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

Tessa

Laurel and Hardy police protection - "And don't worry about informing on the mob. I've arranged that two of my men give you 24 hour proctection."

'He broke his wrist trying to open his medicine.'