Citation Critic Pillows

Report on Plagiarism - 'You've copied all this off the internet...'

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

Herman Mankiewicz

Reading my Critics

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

Lesser known greek gods,

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

"Never mind, Harry. Just remember, the 'Saturday Review' loved it."

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

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'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'

'Mummy, the review of this book was more interesting.'

Master's Degrees of the Universe

'You are doing it wrong.'

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

Sculptor's chippings

Suggestions and Cheap Shots.

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

"My two-year-old actually did paint that."

Art Critics.

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."

"The key is to keep the momentum going when you're establishing the base of the snowman..."

'Nice show but you could use some cartoons.'

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

'Typical phallic egocentrism!'

"To me..It says Art Council crap regional funding"

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"Now on view: Old paintings by dead white men through whenever…"

Four Types of Critics