Church Fashion Enthusiast Pillows

The youth pastor and worship leader compete for the skinniest jeans award.

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

'Due to our failure to secure a holiday-relief organisty, the next hymn will also be sung to the tune of Chopsticks.'

R.C.I.A.

God is for life not just for Christmas.

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

"Since you're into burnt offerings you should come over some Sunday for one of her special dinners."

Angry vicar wakes up parishioner at the Harvest Festival

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

'Our worship space is quite large, Roger, but sanctuary committee will do nicely.'

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

'Are you putting on your Sunday Best, Felix?'

Churchwarden Talking to Rector

Framed dollar in church secretary office says 'Our First Offering'

Heavenly voices.

"Son of God or not, no one comes to church dressed like that."

Vicar

'How well you did it will determine whether it's 'as good as done', Father.'

Pope Francis

Pastor wearing sunglasses against the hymns.

"Although the collection plate appears to be half full, our accountant assures me that it is half empty."

A group of women concerned about a priest climbing a ladder

Using dogs as greeters at church was a failed experiment.

If Adam and Eve were Baptist.

Tonsure Toupee

SOARING BILL

Yeah? Well my father's better at prayers

"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him to fish and you will never see him in church on Sunday again."

Please follow safe worship practices.

'I'm pleased to see my flock ignoring E.U. health and safety regulations!'

Love in Church

"Bible studies class? We're still writing it."

Peter makes another attempt to go to Jesus.

'Buy you new equipment? Are you kidding? Our budget is already so tight that we have a kazooist because we can't afford an organ.'

'4th Sunday before Easter... and 5th before my holiday!'