Chronic Prankster Gifts

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Pinocchio's nose used by cat as a scratching post

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

Boy rolled into a snowball

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

Resourceful toddler

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Tamagotchi paralysis.

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

Dr, Wagner's dental floss spider web made going to the dentist much more appealing to kids,

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Aaannd … Peekaboo!

Teddy Time Bears

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"Where's Waldo? Where's Waldo? Peek-a-boo! There he is!"

'I found what was making those funny noises.'

Ooooh! Someone got a carrot job! Someone got a carrot job!

'I did it all from memory.'

"Ok, I found a secure line."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

Clown Skis.

Tonite: Gala Costume Party. Got your costume for the big party? No, I'll just part my hair on the other side and go as my own reflection.