Chronic_bench_sitter T-Shirts

'Excuse me! We usually sit there.'

"He's no hat and all corgis."

Murder in Apartment 6-K

Christmas Pets

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

Dog Basket - I consent to petting.

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

Cheer up-things aren't so bad.....

Thought bubble mirrors the cloud in the sky.

Pelobong

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

"No you, he called you a lap dog."

'Ten things you should be worried about.'

"...Looks like nothing but snow on TV tonight..."

"I'll be on the porch, pushing ninety."

"But honey, I've spent my last 30 years pretending to look busy. I can't quit overnight."

"First break since 1996!"

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"How long have we been sitting on balls, Jon?"

'Why would you need GPS? Have you suddenly forgotten how to get from the couch to the refrigerator?'

'Gordon, ever since you were given a chair with wheels you've been seen less and less in the office.'

Stationary bicycles.

"If I knew I'd have to walk them for an eternity... I never would have owned so many goddamn dogs!"

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

"So ... taking that nap during my performance review was a very bad idea."

"The Hewletts have flaming crown roast au vin blanc every Wednesday."

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

'You doubtless remember my speech last year...'

'Monday morning feeling? But it's thursday!'

How To Sit When You Are A Kid