Log Sitter T-Shirts

'So what if Tex is sitting on your log? Pick out a new one!'

Church for sports worshipers.

"He's no hat and all corgis."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fived on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

"That's the preacher's dog."

"I can tell it's new because it's alive."

"Show off."

"So, then, I guess the Johnsons are feeding our clothes."

Mr. Bumble and Mrs. Corney taking tea

"And thirteen innocent logs perished in that fire they used to burn Joan."

"You like it? We purchased the fourth wall from 'Westworld'."

"And that's when they left for vacation!"

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

Although in hindsight, maybe she said feed the cat and water the plants.

Ted enjoyed going to the park and feeding the woodpeckers.

"How long have we been sitting on balls, Jon?"

"Won't be a minute Boss, just nippin' to the karzie."

Water the hydrangeas twice a week and trim as needed. The bromeliad only needs to be high-fives on Saturday, but you can give it high and low fives anytime you have a spare moment. Just, whatever you do, don't give it a "too slow" or it will turn inward and begin shutting down.

"The cat walking business didn't go anywhere! Neither did we."

The sound of a crackling fire licking at seasoned logs...

Ice Fishing

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

A cat in a tube

'I love high-definition TV!'

"OPEC tighten the screws. the Larned A. Corys are ready."

Action Film Shushing

Footballer's Wages

How To Sit When You Are A Kid

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'Can you call back? He's busy right now.'