Christmas Morning Chef T-Shirts

"You're late!"

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

Turkey Autopsy

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

"I hear you helped make the stuffing. I like raisins."

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"I stuffed it with things found around the house."

'I know it's daring, but I always try one new recipe for Thanksgiving dinner.'

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

Making Christmas Pudding.

'This month I'll be cooked & my bones ripped apart in a wishing contest.'

Christmas was the one time of year when Roger could take advantage of working in the genetic research laboratory.

Blowing out the Christmas Pudding.

"Too much salt?! Hey, I put a lot of sweat and tears into making that Christmas Pudding!"

"Breakfast hero I presume?"

What will I do with it? It will never fit in the microwave.

Huge Christmas Pudding

I love Sprouts

'I vote we throw caution to the wind.'

'I'll celebrate Christmas in a supermarket and you?'

Christmas canape?

"Apart from writing your new cookery book what else have you been up to?"

"We only have three and twenty black birds for the pie."

"It's a fruitcake, not a catchall."

"Does anyone have a little corner left for a mince pie?"

How to have the perfect Holiday Turkey!

The lifecycle of thanksgiving leftovers

"When you thank god for this meal, put in a good word for your mother too."