Christmas Elf Pillows

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

"If you want more presents, tell Santa he looks thinner in person."

"What's Santa cooking?"

Really? Santa won't stop at your house if you're not asleep on Christmas eve? That sounds like a sort of entrapment to me!

Naughty-ometer.

Christmas Chopin

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

'Well, the magic of Christmas is officially over, unless it includes waking up to a septic tank backup.'

Are we human or are we Dancer, Prancer, Comet and Vixen

"Don't even think about it."

'My brother got all the glory. For me it was Randolph with your nose so pink, you really make my sleigh team stink.'

North Pole.

The ghost of christmas regifting

"I'm afraid this year due to the threat of terrorist attacks...customs controls...parking restrictions...I have decided to outsource the Christmas operation to Ebay and Amazon."

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"

"You know I hate you, right?"

"Kids on the right, elves on the left."

"That 'Spirit of Christmas yet to come' comes around earlier every year..."

"First it was all of that imported stuff and now he's gone with all robotic toy makers!"

Santa with an elf.

Advent calendar of tasks in the run up to Christmas.

"The Ford will give you a son, and you will call him a manual."

"Fa-la-la-la-la,la-labor $95 an hour."

Santa Cruise

"It's 1ime we paid attention to effective branding."

"You're two weeks behind in making toys. What do you mean you now have to test all chess games first?"

Santa trap

'I thought you understood when you took on the job there would be NO Christmas holidays'

Santa bring gifts of milk and cookies to the Nativity.

"Ultimately, I would like to drive my own sleigh."

"What're you doing for Christmas, Randy?"

"Same every year, he gets all tensed updreading the first radio blast of Slade's 'It's Christmas'..."

'Great photo, you're lucky! I've always been too big to sit on Santa's knees...'

"So that's 45,000 Playstations, 198,000 smartphones and 50 million GP consultations."