Chill Lifestyle Enthusiast Pillows

Speed bumps in life are less disruptive when you aren't on the fast track!

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

'Nice, but it needs more angst.'

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Born to be Mild.

"My feet are cold."

His master's chill-out album

"The early bird may get the worm, but the late bird gets delicious table scraps."

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

Glasses half full, half empty, half assed.

"Business trip, eh? Gee, that's too bad."

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

"Baldo, the summer is almost gone and you still haven't found a job!"

'They say pot makes you less motivated, but I've already been to Taco Bell eleven times today.'

"It's our best seller. Perfect for sitting idly by."

'His Dad was a couch potato.'

It is what it is. Settle down! Stop being such a worrywart. What's the worst that could happen? Inactivists.

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

Hasta manana.

'I don't see how you were able to work for so many years. Since you've retired you can't do a thing.'

Zerotasking

"So what do you plan on accomplishing today?"

How to tell when Winter is really bad...

"When you have to shovel your driveway, stupid weather... When you've paid someone to shovel your driveway, stupid weather..."

Summer Road Work

"You've been listening to the mellow sound of Station EZZZ."

'Have you considered having central heating installed?'

'I appreciate the calmness it would bring, I just have trouble letting go..'

'My igloo has been toasty since I insulated with fiber ice.'

'For future reference, just the bottle goes in the chiller.'

"I'm searching my family history in hopes of finding some generational trauma or institutionalized oppression that would explain whole I'm failing all my courses."

Just chilling out...and you?

"It's cold, but it's a dry cold penguin."