Children's Story Fan Pillows

'You'll be happy to know I'll be moving out of your closet as soon as there's a vacancy under your bed.'

Humpty Dumpty goes bungee jumping.

'Jack, we could stop falling down this stupid hill if you'd stop worrying about contaminants in our tap water.'

"The bank rejected my application for a 2nd mortgage. They said they didn't have 1 in my size."

Little Miss Muffet Does Lunch

Rapunzel at the hop

Humpty Dumpty goes skiing.

"You see? God is punishing us because you bought futures in pork bellies."

"Let's just take the Kosciuszko."

'Wait, Bob - find out if she does windows.'

"I'm going for a walk, while this cools. Whatever you do, don't let any, little blonde girls near it!"

"Three pizzas: One too hot, one too cold, and one just right."

The Fourth Little Pig

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

Saint George and the Drag Queen

"Finally, the alphabet is paying off."

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

Pastries and Candy

Moby Dick

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

Jacques et Jille

"I'm in children's books, myself."

Monsters won't eat you if they're not hungry. So, each night, Mom makes it a sandwich. If I keep my room tidy.

Ask A Silly Question.

The unforgiving tree

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

'All right. I'll count sheep, but I thought we were cattlemen.'

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

Romulus and Remus

"Well, how was I supposed to know you were saving them for something special?"

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

Pirates find out treasure is a piggy bank.